Archives for September 2011

Fun Friday Photo 9/30

Three-year-old Annalyn thinks summer play dates are a laughing matter!

 

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Thanks, Mary C., for this wonderful photo.

Photos wanted! Send us your funny, cute, or just plain fun pictures for our Fun Friday Photos. Each Friday we will post a new "Fun Friday Photo." E-mail your photo and a suggested caption describing the photo to parentlife@lifeway.com. Visit the blog each Friday to see if your photo was chosen!

 

Last Call for September!

Tomorrow is September 30th, can you believe it? That means you only have one more day to enter to win a copy of Jeremy Camp’s new autobiography, I Still Believe. In case you forgot or missed that post, you can enter your name into the random drawing by commenting on any post from September on ParentLife Online. Commenting is simple – just put your name in the first box, your e-mail in the second (so we’ll be able to contact you if you win), and say something in that big box. Something relevant is usually appreciated. (Ha!)

We will never share your e-mail address or use it for any purpose except e-mailing you if you win a giveaway.

Here are all of the September posts; pick one that looks interesting, and go comment!

Thumb Sucking and Pacifier Use
Is Your Kid Fruitful? Tips on Getting Kids to Eat Fruits and Veggies
Fun Friday Photo 9/9
Bargain Birthday Bashes
Rainy September (by me!)
September 2011: ParentLife Everyday
Fun Friday Photo 9/16
Products We Love
Autumn Investigations
Real Life Solutions: Aggressive Behavior
5 Tips for Parenting the Two-Child Family by Dr. Kevin Leman
Fun Friday Photo 9/23
Theo Has Arrived!
When Parents Yield Too Much Power

What was your favorite post this month?

When Parents Yield Too Much Power

Our October issues outlines the problems with being a pushover parent. But there is a flip side.
 

The fear...it's here

At the opposite extreme from the pushover parenting style, overly domineering parents exert excessive power and control over their children, with the following harmful results:

  • Using disrespectful intimidation, bullying tactics, and insufficient empathy only provokes more power struggles with children and spurs rebellion against authority figures.
  • Instead of learning respect, cooperation, and self-control, children of domineering parents focus on not getting caught.
  • An intimidating parenting style instills fear, hurt, and shame, and stunts the desire for learning and achievement.

I’m sure you’re heard stories from many people about how a verbally or physically abusive parent has affected their life and how they view themself. Disciplining your children is right and godly … but sometimes it’s hard not to cross the line into unloving and hurtful parenting.

How do you keep a balance in your parenting style? Can you be firm without being a pushover and discipline without being cruel?

Photo used with permission of Flickr Creative Commons. Click on photo for source.

 

Theo Has Arrived!

We’ve talked a few times before about the new LifeWay kids curriculum Theo. (Here’s the sneak peek and here’s some more from creator Mike Joens and a coloring sheet download.)

Theo has finally released! This video-based curriculum is meant to teach children the basics of theology through fun-loving animated characters. Separate DVDs are also available at Christian bookstores everywhere.

 

“Theo the Theologian loves God, and he loves children (of all ages), of all nations and ethnicities,” creator Mike Joens said. “He teaches the fundamentals of Christianity in a way that is both entertaining and biblically sound to kids from two to 92 who love cartoons and have an appetite for God’s Word.”

Every person who buys a “Theo” DVD has an opportunity to participate in the “Buy One – Give One” campaign. Whitestone Media, which produced the cartoon, and CEF will match the purchase by sending a child in need a free “Theo” DVD, once the buyer designates the region of the world where it should be sent.

The LifeWay DVD sets each have five episodes of Theo, with teaching plans and parent information on CD-ROM. 

The release of the DVD Sept. 13 represented the culmination of a dream that began 33 years ago for Joens, when he started working in the animation industry for studios such as Hanna Barbera, Filmation, Warner Brothers and Marvel Productions.

He now has his own company, Whitestone Media, a Christ-centered animation studio dedicated to sharing the truth of Jesus’ death and resurrection.

How would you use Theo in your church?

Fun Friday Photo 9/23

Fun Friday Photo - LizzieLizzie got creative while waiting for her turn to ride a horse on vacation! We think Libbie’s artwork "rocks"!

Thanks Becky W. for this great picture.

Photos wanted! Send us your funny, cute, or just plain fun pictures for our Fun Friday Photos. Each Friday we will post a new "Fun Friday Photo." E-mail your photo and a suggested caption describing the photo to parentlife@lifeway.com. Visit the blog each Friday to see if your photo was chosen!

5 Tips for Parenting the Two-Child Family by Dr. Kevin Leman

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  1.  Give your firstborn a later bedtime. Even if the difference is as little as half an hour, enforce it. Your firstborn is watching.
  2. Make responsibilities and allowances different. The older child gets the most allowance and the most responsibility. But be sure the younger one does her share of the work.
  3. Avoid comparisons. Be aware of the dangers of those famous words, “Why aren’t you like your brother [or sister]?” Your remark is not only damaging, it is a foolish waste of breath.
  4. Don’t feel compelled to do for one what you did for the other. Treating each child differently may mean that sometimes one child gets a little more than the other. But it all evens out.
  5. Do things with one child at a time. Give both children plenty of one-on-one opportunities. Take one child alone on a shopping trip or even a business trip. If possible, leave half an hour early in the morning and stop for breakfast before dropping him at school. Just remember the cardinal rule: if you do something with one child, do something with the other, focusing on the need of each child.

How do you parent your older and younger children differently?

Dr. Kevin Leman, whose professional affiliations include the American Psychological Association, American Federation of Television and Radio Artists, National Register of Health Services Providers in Psychology, and the North American Society of Adlerian Psychology, earned his Doctorate degree in psychology from the University of Arizona. He lives in Tucson, Arizona, with his wife, Sande, and they have five children.

Dr. Leman is the author of more than 30 books and a dozen audio and DVD video titles. His bestsellers include: The Firstborn Advantage; The Birth Order Book: Why You Are The Way You Are; Have a New Kid by Friday; What Your Childhood Memories Say About You; Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours; Single Parenting That Works!; First Time Mom; What a Difference a Daddy Makes.

 Photo used with permission of Flickr Creative Commons. Click on photo for source.

Real Life Solutions: Aggressive Behavior

mintle03(2).jpgWe are proud to have Dr. Linda Mintle in ParentLife each month answering questions submitted from readers. To submit a question for Dr. Mintle, e-mail it to parentlife@lifeway.com and include "? for Dr. Mintle" on the subject line. This month we have an extra Q&A from Dr. Mintle we wanted to share.

Q: Lately my son has become aggressive. I wonder if he is acting out because of the tension he feels between my husband and me. We have a lot of conflict in our marriage. Do you think our son is reacting to the constant fighting in our home?

A: Most likely you have put your finger on the problem. Kids do not like it when their parents fight. The tension is upsetting, and they do not know how to process it. So they act out, usually a cry for help.

The fix is to work on reducing marital conflict and treating each other better. If this means seeing a marital therapist, do it for the sake of your son. Humble yourselves. Find the root of all the tension and work on those issues.

Unresolved conflict that leads to criticism is the first step in a marriage headed for divorce. Criticism leads to feelings of contempt. Contempt brings defensive behavior and eventually leads to putting up a wall and becoming emotionally distant. Emotional distance is the number-one predictor of divorce. So you can’t allow this negative behavior to continue between you and your spouse.

Most marital issues are fixable when couples get help from qualified Christian therapists. Before things move in a negative direction, get a referral from your church, a trusted friend, or a professional familiar with local options. Look for someone who is a licensed marriage and family therapist (LMFT).

As you begin to resolve issues, you will notice a positive change in your son’s aggression, and you will model for your son the type of marriage you want him to have one day.

 

Autumn Investigations

 

In our October issue, Kelly Wilson Mize writes about ways to enjoy the autumn season with your kids. Autumn is also a great time for science experiments involving the outdoors! Here is Kelly’s list of Web sites that provide ideas for experimentation.

 

Science Bob
http://www.sciencebob.com/index.php

Science is Fun
http://scifun.chem.wisc.edu/

Science Kids
http://www.sciencekids.co.nz/

Try Science
http://www.tryscience.org/

Zoom/PBS Kids
http://pbskids.org/zoom/activities/sci/

Do you have a go-to Web site for finding activities for your kids? I’m a big fan of Impress Your Kids and I Can Teach My Child.

 

Products We Love, October 2011

Products We Love button

 

Every month we have a long list of products we want to share with you, but only a few can fit in the printed magazine. That’s why it’s so great we have this online space! Here are a few things we couldn’t squeeze into the October 2011 issue.

 

Manner-Mat-Cover.jpgManner Mats®

Each pad of Manner Mats includes 38 tear-off placemats full of games, puzzles, and conversation starters sure to turn mealtime into a lesson in social skills. For ages 6 and up; $9.95. Visit www.blundersmania.com.

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This child’s bracelet from A Gracious Plenty would make a beautiful gift for a little girl’s birthday or baptism. It can be personalized with a monogram, date, or short inscription. $46

Are there any products you love and share with everyone you know?  (Remember, commenting on any entry in September enters you to win the Jeremy Camp book I Still Believe!)

Fun Friday Photo 9/16

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Arolynn and friends went to get their nails done as part of Arolynn’s 8th birthday celebration!

Thanks to Grandma Carolyn F. for this great picture.

Photos wanted! Send us your funny, cute, or just plain fun pictures for our Fun Friday Photos. Each Friday we will post a new "Fun Friday Photo." E-mail your photo and a suggested caption describing the photo to parentlife@lifeway.com. Visit the blog each Friday to see if your photo was chosen!