I remember when we were in the middle of raising our twins and I wondered if they were ready to “fly the coop.” My first thought was no way.  But fly they did.

Did they make mistakes?

Sure. 

So did I. 

But eventually, the empty nest has become a sweet time in life, filled with GRANDchildren and time to refocus on my man.

Someone told me early in my parenting days, “Make sure you love your husband more than your children, because in ideal situations you will be with him longer than you were with your parents or will be with your children.”  Even the judge who presided over our adoption of twin daughters told us to make sure we get away at least once a year, just the two of us, to focus on our marriage. Because we took that to heart, after 42 years of marriage I can say… it was SO worth it. Our girls have been gone almost half of our marriage at this point and if we had not intentionally stayed connected during the younger parenting years, I wonder what our empty next would be like.

As women’s leaders, how do you minister to moms? Often, they wonder how well they have prepared children for adulthood. Sometimes our children choose to head off in a direction completely contrary to what we taught them. Yes, scripture says  “Teach a youth about the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6, HCSB) But what about in the meantime? What if their child strays?

Once they’ve have done ALL they can to raise and pour themselves and their faith into a child, then they must take their hands off (not their love nor prayers) and hand them to God…sometimes over and over and over again. It’s not easy, but as you help them walk this path with Christ, they will experience a deeper walk with Christ as they trust Him to work in their child’s life even if they cannot see it right now.

On many occasions, I have experienced peace during crisis with family and I can tell you it’s real. And I can vow that I could not know my God like I do, nor trust Him as I do, if I had not journeyed this way.

Women on the path of pain with children need someone who has experienced something similar to what they are facing. They need some accountability partners or prayer warriors to pray for them and their family. Help them get in the Word and read the truths He has like Romans 4:20-21, “ He did not waver in unbelief at God’s promise but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, because he was fully convinced that what He had promised He was also able to perform.” (HCSB) or Psalm 143:8, “Let me experience Your faithful love in the morning, for I trust in You. Reveal to me the way I should go because I long for You.”

God will use you to walk with these moms every step of the way. Show them how to trust Him with their life. If they can do that, they certainly can trust Him with their heart and their child.

If you are a woman who has a friend in crisis with their child, check out this article:

10 Simple Ways To Help Mothers Of Prodigal Children, or check out the resources,  Women Reaching Women in Crisis

 

Resources:

A Trusted Friend

Women Reaching Women

Shepherding Women in Pain, Bev Hislop

Women Reaching Women in Crisis , LifeWay Women Live web cast

American Association of Christian Counselors

Comments

  1. My kids are 21, 20 and 16 and getting older every day. The empty nest haunts me. But God has gracefully been working on my heart in preparation of its full entry into my life. Over the past few months I thought God was really working on my husband…turns out He was working on me! I was finally able to tell me husband, “If you get a promotion or new job, I won’t fuss or fight if we have to move away from the kids. YOU are the one I want to spend the rest of my life with.” Sure, I will cry and invest in Kleenex but it has made a big difference in my relationship with my husband. Thanks for these encouraging words. Amy

  2. Thanks so much for sharing! I know this is sensitive for many moms!

Speak Your Mind

*


3 × = twenty one