Tales of a Secret Agent, part 1

I am Special Agent 43.5.
I am Special Agent 43.5
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My identity is a secret.

I track down the truth about questions like:
I track down the truth about deep questions like, what is our purpose on earth? How do I know that I can trust what God says? And, how DO I open this briefcase?
Today’s Mission: Pick up this package.
Today’s Mission: Pick up this package.
Memorize the address where it needs to be delivered.
Memorize the encoded address where it needs to be delivered.
And destroy it.
And destroy it.
Without choking.
Without choking.
And without being caught by the Legion of Doom (an evil subversive organization tasked with taking over the world.)
And without being caught by the Legion of Doom (an evil subversive organization tasked with taking over the world.)
According to the message delivered to my watch transmitter, under no circumstances am I to read the contents of this very dangerous package while I am trying to deliver it.
According to the message delivered to my watch transmitter, under no circumstances am I to read the contents of this very dangerous package while I am trying to deliver it.
I successfully gained entrance to the secret headquarters where the package was to be delivered
I successfully gained entrance to the secret headquarters where the package was to be delivered...
...using my authority as an Agent for Agency D3.
...using my authority as an Agent for Agency D3.

But that was where the easy times stopped.
But that was where the easy times stopped.
I was followed down the hallways by Legion of Doom Agents,
I was followed down the hallways by Legion of Doom Agents,

 

which I knew because of my highly specialized rearview glasses.
which I knew because of my highly specialized rearview glasses.
Ambushed by bubbles which always cause me break into violent fits of giggles.
Ambushed by bubbles...
which always cause me break into violent fits of giggles.
...which always cause me to break into violent fits of giggles.
and more giggles.
and more giggles.
and more...
and more...
And nearly hit in the face ...
And nearly hit in the face ...

 

...with an exploding capsule...
...with an exploding capsule...

...containing a highly volatile material.

...containing a highly volatile material.