More Communication Wisdom From Dr. Gary Chapman

We’re so very thankful to have Dr. Gary Chapman share his wisdom with HomeLife readers! Here are a few more of his tips for developing rich communication in your marriage (“Sweet Talk,” March 2013):

Emotions are a natural part of life. All feelings have their place in our lives, and many of them communicate a lot about us. Most of our feelings are tied to some experience we had in our past or something we are going through now. The next time you feel disappointed, ask yourself, “What stimulated my disappointment?” Then try to share that specifically with your spouse. Revealing your feelings lets your spouse know what is going on inside of you—what you are feeling and why. For example, you might say, “I’m feeling angry with myself because I came home late last night and we missed our dinner reservations.” Such a statement may encourage your mate to say, “I’m disappointed too. Maybe we can do it Thursday.” Revealing your feelings creates an atmosphere of intimacy and trust.

Conversely, when your spouse shares his or her feelings, don’t respond with condemnation. If you say, “Well, that’s nothing to be disappointed about. You shouldn’t let that bother you,” you have become a preacher, not a loving listener. Saying, “I can see how that would be disappointing. Tell me more about it,” encourages openness.

Not only do we need to share our thoughts and feeling, we also need to share our desires. Expressing your desires in terms of “I want …, I wish …, I hope …, or I would like …” gives your spouse valuable information instead of making demands. If you express the desire for a new dress for the party, then perhaps your spouse will desire to make it happen. If he doesn’t know this desire, he is not likely to come up with the idea himself. I’m not suggesting that we do everything our spouse requests. But, sharing our desires makes it possible to have a meaningful response. Incidentally, helping fulfill the desires of your spouse is one way of expressing your love.

More Show Some Love Family Time Ideas

Happy Valentine’s Week! We hope you and your family are planning a fun February 2013 Family Time, if you haven’t had one already. Here are a few extra ideas to make your time special:

Tissue pom

1. Decorate with red, pink, and white tissue poms. They’re easy to make and inexpensive, but they make a big visual impact. Very festive! Check out a tutorial here: http://www.marthastewart.com/265163/pom-poms-and-luminarias-how-to Note: If you don’t have floral wire, yarn or kitchen twine will work.

2. Play Valentine’s tic-tac-toe. Xs and Os stand for kisses and hugs, so a few twists would make for an easy Family Time activity. Check out this free printable to use with candies: http://www.jodiefitz.com/2013/01/23/free-valentines-printable/ Or you could make this cute homemade tic-tac-toe board with construction paper and felt: http://alphamom.com/family-fun/holidays/valentine-craft-tic-tac-toe-hearts/

3. Make marshmallow pops for a sweet treat. My boys aren’t big fans of chocolate, so this would be a great option for us. Here’s a cute tutorial: http://www.applevalleygirl.blogspot.ca/2013/01/valentines-marshmallow-pops.html

4. Serve heart-shaped bacon. This tip is especially for HomeLife contributor Sophie Hudson, aka Boomama! :) If you go with a breakfast theme, you could serve this with heart-shaped pancakes and use cookie cutters to cut fruit into heart shapes (http://www.recipebyphoto.com/valentines-day-fruit/). Can’t picture what heart-shaped bacon looks like? Check this out: http://moneysavvymichelle.com/how-to-make-bacon-hearts/

5. Let love be a little messy. My boys may not be big into the hearts and flowers of Valentine’s Day, but I’m SURE they would love to make this Valentine’s Slime. (Yes, slime!) Here’s a fun and messy activity using items you probably already have on hand: http://itsgravybaby.com/2012/02/how-to-make-slime-preschool-craft/

What fun activities or ideas do you have for your Show Some Love Family Time? We would love to hear your ideas. Share in the comments!

~~~

Dawn Hollomon is a minister’s wife, mom to a preschooler and teenager adopted from Ethiopia, and the editor of HomeLife.

CLOSED Giveaway: VeggieTales – Lettuce Love One Another!

Congratulations to our winner, Loucrecia! Please check your email!

Are you planning to do this month’s Show Some Love Family Time? (It’s not too late! See below for a PDF.)

One of my primary love languages is giving gifts, and I have one for you! To add a little more fun to your Family Time and to celebrate Valentine’s Day, we’re giving away a copy of VeggieTales: Lettuce Love One Another!

VeggieTales Lettuce Love One Another

About the DVD:

VeggieTales: Lettuce Love One Another! includes three popular VeggieTales episodes—Tomato Sawyer & Huckleberry Larry’s Big River Rescue, Abe and the Amazing Promise and King George and the Ducky—in addition to five brand-new “Bible Bits,” story shorts that demonstrate examples of giving and forgiving, helping, praying and sharing. Each episode in this collection helps teach a valuable lesson about love, whether it’s through honoring others when we help them, having patience or the importance of putting others first.

Download February’s Show Some Love Family Time here: February 2013 Family Time

Enter below to win! The winner will be chosen first thing Monday morning. Have a lovely weekend! :)

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Looking for Real-Life Dad Heroes!

Update: Thanks to all of you who have already sent your real-life dad hero stories! If you haven’t yet, it’s not too late. We’re accepting submissions until Monday, March 11th.

We’re celebrating dads in our June issue!

Do you know a dad who’s an everyday hero? Maybe he doesn’t have thousands of Twitter followers or isn’t leading a Fortune 500 company, but he’s a hero at home. We want to honor him!

Here’s the info we need:

1. Your name and contact information
2. The dad’s name and contact information
3. An email detailing why you think this dad is a hero in his home (200 to 400 words)

Share your stories at homelife@lifeway.com. We’ll contact you for more info if we choose to print your story. You may see this dad in our June issue!

Printable Scripture Word Art: Psalm 19:14

Check out our printable Scripture word art for February!

Psalm 19:14

Download Psalm 19:14 printable here: Psalm 19:14 PDF

Printable Scripture Word Art: Galatians 3:28

Check out our printable Scripture word art for February!

Galatians 3:28

Download Galatians 3:28 printable here: Galatians 3:28 PDF

Printable Scripture Word Art: Isaiah 43:19

Check out our printable Scripture word art for February!

Isaiah 43:19

Download the Isaiah 43:19 printable here: Isaiah 43:19

Savings Tips From Kelly Hancock

Did you the February article “Balance the Grocery Scales” by Kelly Hancock of Faithful Provisions? She offers some timely and practical ways to save on your food expenses, especially as food costs continue to rise. You don’t want to miss it!

Here Kelly shares a few more ways to save even more money and still be able to give generously:

Third-world countries will feel the U. S. drought even more than we will. Now is not the time to stop giving to world relief efforts and global ministries. What can you do so that your budget is able to handle an increase in groceries without a decrease in giving?

  • Cut the cable. – If we’re honest, we’ll admit that all of us could do with less TV.
  • Do it yourself  – Invest in a washable travel mug and make your own coffee in the morning, rather than purchasing an expensive brand name. You can also make your own pizza (see sidebar), and resolve to cook more things from scratch.
  • Put off major expenditures. – Make do with what you have for as long as you can.
  • Consignment sales. – This is the best way to save on clothes for growing kids.

This is a time to trust the Lord. When we decrease our giving during difficult times, we’re not showing the world that we trust in the Lord and His ability to care for us. As a community of faith, Christians glorify Him best when we continue on in good works, even when it’s hard. Remember the story of the widow’s mite in Luke 21? The widow gave sacrificially, without regard to her own need. When our prices rise and our budgets have to stretch, we are tempted to cut back on our charitable giving first. But in God’s economy, that’s the last thing we should do. Continuing to give during financial hardship is an opportunity to show our faith in God. It’s our chance to put our faith in action, trusting Him to work it all out for good. If we are diligent to stay in His Word every day, keeping His promises in front of us, we’ll remember how faithful He is, especially when the going gets tough.

About Kelly:

Kelly Hancock is the author of Saving Savvy: Smart and Easy Ways to Cut Your Spending in Half and Raise Your Standard of Living…and Giving! Learning to live on less than half her family’s former income was a necessity when she became a stay-at-home mom, and critical when her husband lost his job soon after. Daily, Kelly shares the principles of what she calls, “Grocery Savings,” on her cost-cutting blog, FaithfulProvisions.com.

CLOSED Giveaway: The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman

Congratulations to Nikki! Please check your email! :) Thanks to everyone for participating.

Happy February! Did you catch this month’s Family Time: Show Some Love? To celebrate the love month, we’re giving away a copy of The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman.

Enter below! We’ll choose the winner Monday morning.

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Family Time Calendar: February 2013

Download our printable Family Time Calendar for February 2013: Show Some Love!

February 2013 Calendar

Click here for a printable PDF: February 2013 Family Time Calendar