Each day we face situations where we question whether to keep our mouths shut or step up to intervene in a situation, preventing it from going from bad to worse. Here’s an option to introduce today’s study.
Before the session, copy and paste the following scenarios. Divide the small group into three groups, giving each group two of the scenarios to discuss. Or, you could form six groups with one scenario each. Ask groups to identify the easiest solution and the best solution.
#1: You become aware that your best friend’s husband is having an affair. What do you do?
- Confront the husband and tell him he has 1 week to tell his wife or you will.
- Say nothing until the best friend finds out.
- Tell someone else so they can intervene.
- Go on a vacation and pray it’s all over when you return.
#2: At a work party, your husband, feeling a little stressed, unintentionally insults his boss. What do you do?
- Cringe and start Google-ing new jobs on your iPhone
- Pull your man aside and gently explain his faux pas.
- Go to the boss, explain everyone makes mistakes when nervous, and invite him to dinner.
- Keep your mouth shut and pray.
#3: In a meeting, a coworker describes how she has been cheating the company in an undetectable way to increase commissions. You should:
- Find out how you can be a part of this
- Stop the meeting and read the 10 Commandments
- Wait until after the meeting to confront the coworker to explain how this scheme hurts all employees.
#4: In a small group, one woman continues to dominate the discussion by bringing up inappropriate stories about other church members. What would you do?
- Quit going to small group
- Talk about it with all the other small group members to determine how to shun her
- Interrupt her as she begins to speak saying, “Let’s give everyone a chance to talk.”
- Pray. Confront her privately. Ask if there are any issues you can help her with outside of class.
#5: Your sister is about to make a dreadful choice. The dress she’s decided is the MOB (Momzilla of the Bridezilla!) dress for her is unflattering in all the wrong ways. What do you do?
- Warn family and friends about the coming fashion disaster
- Intervene early, right in the dressing room by saying while it’s a pretty dress, there’s something better for her
- Buy her a dress that is more becoming as a gift
- In private (before she pulls out her credit card!) ask her what it is she likes about the dress and if she is willing to keep trying on dresses.
#6: Your daughter’s best friend married against the advice of her family and friends to disastrous results. You and your daughter made a pact that if she fell for the wrong man, you’d intervene and she’d listen. Now, you see things in her boyfriend that frighten you. You do some checking and your worse fears are true. What do you do?
- Pray your daughter’s eyes will be opened to the truth
- Trust your daughter and keep quiet
- Ask your daughter to go on a prayer retreat with you, after praying together you express your fears.
- Try to act like a crazed, demanding woman so the boy will run!
Gather the groups and ask for each to briefly share what they have discussed. End the discussion time by continuing to The Point on page 114 of the personal study guide. As the session progresses, consider making these substitutions:
- Question #2: Abigail stepped in to rectify her husband’s error. She went against cultural norms to prevent a bad situation from becoming a disaster. When do we step in and when do we step back? How do we know the difference?
- Question #3: Abigail followed God’s authority rather than man’s idea. What keeps you from stepping in to stop a disaster from occurring?
- Question #4: Think about Abigail’s method of stepping in. What did she model that we can learn from?
- Question #5: What does the way Abigail stepped in say about her character?
Continue through the Live It Out on page 120 of the personal study guide. Pray for women to have the wisdom to know when to intervene, the courage to intervene when needed, the grace to intervene in a way that glorifies God, and the humility to intervene in a nonthreatening way.
We want to hear from you! How are you introducing the topic of stepping in to intervene with the women in your class or small group?
The options for women for the When Relationships Collide unit were written by Deb Douglas, Minister to Women and Hope of First Baptist Bossier City, LA. Deb is a wife, mother, grandmother (call her Pearl!), writer, seamstress, and foodie! Follow her on twitter: DrDebDouglas and her blog: pinkkudzu.wordpress.com.